“I’m Not that Girl” by Cynthia Erivo from Wicked
"I'm Not that Girl" by Cynthia Erivo from Wicked
Amazing Moments in Timbre | Timbre and Orchestration Writings
by Kambria Cook
Published: June 16, 2025
Welcome to the land of Oz, a land of hope, joy, magic, and resentment. A land that is not yet discovered by Dorothy, but act as the building blocks before her arrival. This is Wicked. The movie Wicked is an adaptation of the original Broadway musical. It follows the story of how Elphaba, an “outcast” born with green skin and magical powers, becomes the Wicked Witch of the West. For my analysis, I will be using the movie adaptation of Wicked, along with the 2024 movie soundtrack recording of “I’m Not That Girl” by Cynthia Erivo, who plays Elphaba. In Cynthia Erivo’s recording of “I’m Not That Girl,” the emotional narrative is supported by Cynthia’s use of an expressive vocal timbre.
Shiz University has just enforced a new rule that states, “Animals are no longer permitted to teach.” Dr. Dillamond, a professor who is a goat, is forcefully removed from the classroom after sharing this news with his students. A new human professor then enters the classroom with a baby cub locked in a cage, explaining how this will be the future for all animals. Animals hold a special place in Elphaba’s heart, given she was raised by them. In frustration from hearing the news, Elphaba, still learning how to control her powers, accidentally puts everyone asleep, except for Fiyero (her friend’s boyfriend). Fiyero and Elphaba then run off into the woods to set the cub free. While they are in the woods, their hands touch for a brief moment, and they feel a spark. Fiyero tries to refocus, but eventually runs off with the cub, while Elphaba is left alone in the woods to process what just took place.
“I’m Not That Girl” is about Elphaba realizing she is not the type of girl that Fiyero would love. She has been made fun of all her life for her green skin, often seen as a troublemaker, when in reality she is a sweet and caring person. To guard her heart, Elphaba pushes her emotions for Fiyero aside.
The song starts off with Elphaba shocked by what just took place. Listeners can hear the moment of shock through the slow tempo of the song and Cynthia’s soft volume when singing “hands touch, eyes meet.” Her voice melts, like the delicacy of a violinist lightly drawing their bow across a string. Additionally, she is whispering the words “touch” and “meet” in her mix vocal register. The whispers sound airy and light, as if her vocal folds are not fully coming together to produce the sound. Her whispers suggest Elphaba’s moment with Fiyero took her breath away. Cynthia is even letting go of the ending consonants in the words “touch” and “meet.” Musical theatre students are taught to use diction, shadow vowels, and to over enunciate. However, her lack of enunciation in this moment, allows the listener to hear how Elphaba was in deep thought.
As the song continues, she sings the word “sudden” quickly closing to the “n” instead of staying on the “e” vowel. The “n” sounds like she is murmuring a sweet melody. She uses different vocal colors to express different emotions. For example, she sings “sudden silence” in her head voice, continuing the sweet melody as if she is stuck in a daze. Then she immediately switches to her chest voice for “sudden heat,” as if she has come out of the daze to acknowledge her first time feeling a spark with anyone. Additionally, the tone of her chest voice is filled with warmth, representing the heat she felt when their hands touched. These vocal choices support her realization that she likes Fiyero and opens a door to her believing he may like her. However, Elphaba slowly closes that door as the song continues.
Once Elphaba sings “he could be that boy,” she sustains the word “that” through her brassy and smooth straight tone, leaving a moment for her to think she has a chance. Nevertheless, she pauses briefly at the end of the phrase before proceeding with, “but I’m not that girl” (0:58–01:12). The pause is when we begin to hear the fight she is having with herself to either give up on love or to hold on to it. The phrase “but I’m not that girl,” is her slowly and reluctantly accepting her “fate.” One can hear the defeat in her voice during this phrase. She speak-sings “but” then quickly transitions back to singing on the word “I’m,” holding the note just enough for us to hear her sweet and warm timbre. She quickly sings “not,” and then goes on to sing “that girl,” holding those two words out with clarity, and ends the phrase with a decrescendo and vibrato on the word “girl.” This decrease in volume represents her defeat. Furthermore, the slow tempo and rubato during this section expresses how she does not want to let go of this moment where she finally feels seen, loved, and wanted. However, she feels she needs to let go of it, to protect her feelings.
As the song continues (2:36–2:42), Elphaba has come to terms with not being the type of girl Fiyero could love. Her vocal presence is stronger and louder as she sings “but I’m not that girl” at the end of the third verse, expressing a confidence in knowing where she stands in society. Moreover, she sings this line at a faster tempo, compared to the way she sang it during the first verse at 0:58–01:12. This faster tempo suggests she wants to quickly let go of what could be.
Cynthia Erivo’s vocal timbre allowed the audience to understand the emotional conflict Elphaba was experiencing. Elphaba tried so hard to believe she could be loved by Fiyero, but her doubts and fears led to her letting go of being loved. Analyzing Cynthia’s timbral choices, specifically, the dynamic contrast, vocal register, diction, and tempo changes, offered a deeper understanding of Elphaba’s emotional narrative.
References
Heidemann, Kate. “A System for Describing Vocal Timbre in Popular Song.” Music Theory Online, no. 1 (2016): 4.1-4.6.
Chu M., John, director. Wicked. Universal Pictures and Marc Platt Productions, 2024. 2 hr., 40 min. https://www.peacocktv.com/watch/playback/vod/GMO_00000000243022_02_HDSDR/07cbd2a1-92f7-3810-b1d0-c80a9b29fb08?paused=true
Republic Records, “I’m Not That Girl (From Wicked The Soundtrack).” YouTube, November 21, 2024, 0:31 to 0:50, https://youtu.be/CeUragIeYXg?si=j9RjGMws71SoJB0g&t=31.
Republic Records, “I’m Not That Girl (From Wicked The Soundtrack).” YouTube, November 21, 2024, 0:58 to 1:12, https://youtu.be/CeUragIeYXg?si=PpwjpZjkPNjINCGw&t=58.
Republic Records, “I’m Not That Girl (From Wicked The Soundtrack).” YouTube, November 21, 2024, 2:36 to 2:42, https://youtu.be/CeUragIeYXg?si=wy4FOJnEs2jAzULC&t=156.
Reymore, Lindsey. “A timbral motivic analysis of Obermüller’s different forms of phosphorous for solo English horn.” YouTube video, 20:01. July 10, 2021. https://youtu.be/paTGVVRwERg?feature=shared.